The Other Half's an arsehole

I was going to talk about more snippets from our holiday in Ibiza but instead I have decided to have a bitch and moan about The Other Half who right at this moment in time has really really annoyed me and brought me to the brink of tears.

It all started yesterday when he said he was going to be working late. Uh Oh I hear you utter but it's not like that, at least I hope not, as he sometimes genuinely does work late. Anyway, I didn't hear from him all afternoon and evening until eventually I was woken by a text in the middle of the night saying, "In Holiday Inn" and that was it. Okay, I thought. So he has missed the last train home. It happens.

I generally try and be pretty chilled when this happens as it has done before but even my patience is tried somewhat because I know he is only working so late before going out on the lash with work colleagues. He gets incredibly selfish when drunk and unfortunately it is me who bears the brunt of it. I am sure any blokes who might read this would say what was wrong with his behaviour, let the poor bastard let off some steam. But I reckon there are a fair few women out there who could identify with how I am feeling.

Anyway, as I said I tried to be very chilled about it, didn't call him, didn't text. But then by mid morning today I still hadn't heard anything so I decided to call him. No reply. Next thing I get a text saying, "Sorry with client. Love u." which is generally code for I know I am being an arsehole but I hope this little platitude will smooth things over. That was the last I heard and he didn't even bother to ask how Pork Chop was.

I didn't start worrying until just a couple of hours ago after trying to call him to find out what time he was going to be home and if he wanted dinner. No reply. I texted. No reply. I called again. No reply. I texted again. Twice. Still no reply. I phoned again a few times to no avail. I am conscious of the fine line we have to tread between trying to get hold of someone and appearing like a bit of bunny boiler. However, I think I have special dispensation being as I am the mother of his child and we do live together. So now it is fair to say I am pretty upset and am not quite sure what I have done to deserve being treated like this.

Of course, if I do raise it when he does eventually roll in no doubt pissed off his head and stinking of fags it will be my fault for getting on his back. He will tell me he is bringing home the bacon after all while I am at home and therefore in his mind that is a catch all phrase for anything selfish he decides to do. I will no doubt go to bed without him, he will do his usual of falling asleep on the sofa and then tomorrow moan about how ill he feels and expect me to run around him like a eager to please puppy.

I fear I am in danger of becoming a neurotic and suspicious doormat here. I always thought i was pretty chilled out when it came to relationships. Don't call too often, don't appear too eager, let them do the running and come to you. However, I am seriously beginning to wonder if he is seeing someone else and he thinks I am such a big mug he can get away with feeding me the bullshit about working late I will of course not question it because he is the breadwinner after all and doing an important job. I am however, just a housewife now and should therefore not question his motives or actions. God it pisses me off!

However, at least writing this has provided some sort of cathartic release and stopped me from actually bursting into tears. The question is where do I go from here? Do I continue calling him and probably making myself look even more clingy and needy or do I just leave it and wait until he deigns to put in an appearance? I keep having imaginary conversations with him - all the things I would love to say to him but probably never will and will just continue seething with resentment instead. Maybe I should let him read this so he gets some idea of how I feel.

Anyway, rant over. I was excited to see on Kevin and Perry goes large the beach where we spent the last few days of holiday in Ibiza. It was quite strange seeing the place where we had been sunbathing just last week beign used for a film.